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"It's too bad stupidity isn't painful."
Volume 15, Number 17, April 25, 2010
Greetings, and thanks for joining me for another week. Starting us off are a few news stories you may have missed. First, f-bombs away (or maybe it’s all in how one is brought up – I rarely swear - really). From CNN: Democrats were pretty satisfied back in 2004 when former Vice President Dick Cheney on the Senate floor told a senior lawmaker to "f**k" himself because they thought that outburst was accurately symbolic of Cheney's hard-heartedness and character. Six years later, Cheney is looking back on that moment with pride. "You'd be surprised how many people liked that. That's sort of the best thing I ever did." Yup, I’d say that’s something to be really proud of.
Next, youthful Indiscretions or the past meets the present. Here’s an interesting dilemma…. A man named John White is running for sheriff in Roundup, Mont. If he is elected, he will be unable to carry a gun because of a long-ago bank robbery conviction. [Billings Gazette]
Finally, learning about other cultures. Last fall, in Ahmedabad District, India, Ramveer Singh Baghel, 35, sliced off his tongue as an offering to the goddess Amba (I guess it could have been worse… the slicing off of something, I mean). I don’t know if she accepted it or not, but his sacrifice made him an instant deity in the local temple, the achievement of which gave him new responsibilities with his admiring subjects thereby delaying his trip to the hospital. [Times of India]
One of the biggest problems with our society is simply that people don’t play fair anymore. "I do apologize," says Robby Rose, 45. "I snapped. I lost my mind." That, he says, explains why he cheated in a bass fishing tournament on Lake Ray Hubbard, Texas. "I've been bullied by tournament officials for the last eight years," he whined, saying he has passed multiple lie detector tests in the past. Such tests are common in fishing tournaments. But when he was caught red-handed, Rose pleaded guilty to putting a one-pound lead weight into the fish he caught before turning it in. Tournament officials got suspicious when the fish, which was still alive, sank when it was put into a holding tank. Because the prize was a $55,000 fishing boat, Rose's attempted theft conviction is a felony. He was sentenced to 15 days in jail, probation for five years, and suspension of his fishing license. [Dallas Morning News ]
On the other hand, when people do do their jobs, sometimes it doesn’t matter. Starting in 1999 a man allegedly alerted the SEC about a problem he saw. He did so repeatedly, both orally and in writing, and was totally ignored. As it turns out, that fund manager he complained about was Bernie Madoff, creator of the largest Ponzi scheme ever, who swindled about $65 billion out of unsuspecting investors. The overseers don't even do their jobs when somebody else is doing their job for them!
A related Bit may explain the last one…. Recent news shows Securities and Exchange Commission senior staffers using government computers to browse pornography (probably looking at the current government expenditures), One accountant is listed as trying to access such prurient sites 16,000 times in one month. With an average work month of 22 days, that’s like 727 sites a day! Wowsers! That’s pretty impressive! Even on a good day, I can only… uh, never mind. With those kinds of numbers it's no surprise they don't have any time to waste on securities regulation. Who will guard the guardians???
Family values! Evelyn Burgess of Columbus, Ohio, recently hosted a family Easter dinner, but she saw that her husband "took notice" of what her teenaged second cousin was wearing -- a "revealing" t-shirt and shorts -- and got upset. The outfit "was inappropriate and disrespectful to wear at Easter dinner," she told officers who responded to what happened next. The hostess and the girl fought before going outside to the car, where Burgess, 42, shot Danielle Pickens, 19, in the head, killing her. [Columbus Dispatch]
Reuters carried a Bit that caught my eye: Forget about getting a job as a police officer in Indonesia's Papua if you have had your, uh, member enlarged. You won't get the job, according to local media reports citing the Papua police chief. An applicant "will be asked whether or not his vital organ has been enlarged," said Papua police chief Bekto Suprapto.. "If he has, he will be considered unfit to join the police or the military." The ban was applied since the unnatural size causes "hindrance during training," said a police spokesman. Me? I’d probably make chief immediately!
The punishment fitting the crime. An Australian woman who ran down and killed a man who threw cheese-flavored snacks at her car was jailed for 25 years. Sydney woman Sarah May Ward intended to injure Eli Westlake for throwing the snacks at her vehicle, judge Roderick Howie told the New South Wales Supreme Court, describing the 21-year-old's murder as "a senseless act of anger." "She clearly wanted to teach the young man a lesson," said the judge as he sentenced Ward to jail for a minimum 18 years. The jury was told Ward, 39, had drunk two bottles of wine and used cannabis, amphetamine drugs and anti-depressants before getting into her car. [Yahoo News]
From www.azcentral.com - Albuquerque police have arrested a man on child abuse charges, alleging he was drunk and let his 11-year-old nephew drive. Officers say the boy lost control of the pickup truck and slammed into a car in a driveway, pushing it into a tree. Police say the child abuse charges against Ivan Tena-Munoz were filed because he put the child and the child's 14-year-old brother in danger. According to a criminal complaint, the boy tried to drive away from the scene (they learn young) but neighbors stopped the truck. Police say the two boys fled, leaving Tena-Munoz in the truck.
One in five people in Britain thinks that haggis, the traditional Scottish dish made from the lung, liver and heart of a sheep (and is boiled in its stomach), is an animal that roams the Highlands, according to a survey. Commissioned by the online takeaway food service Just-Eat.co.uk, the survey found that 18 percent of Britons believe that haggis is a hilltop-dwelling animal. Another 15 percent said it is a Scottish musical instrument while 4 percent admitted to thinking it was a character from Harry Potter. The survey questioned 1,623 people across Britain to see how well they were acquainted with traditional Scottish food. Even 14 percent of the 781 Scottish people polled said they did not know what haggis was. Let’s be honest here – how many of you knew before this Bit what haggis is???
Some great quotes for your edification: (1) “The purpose of life is a life of purpose.” Robert Byrne. (2) “Life is simple, it's just not easy.” Author Unknown. (3) “My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot.” Ashleigh Brilliant. (4) “Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.” Author Unknown. (5) “The Constitution only guarantees the American people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.” Benjamin Franklin. Bonus: “Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it.” Fyodor Dostoevsky.
Finally, from www.myfoxaustin.com, a 72-year-old woman was pulled over for speeding, then tasered and sent to jail. Kathryn Winkfein says she drives to Austin about twice a month to do her shopping. But on the fateful day, a Travis County Constable deputy pulled her over. "Due to being a construction zone, and workers being present," Pct. 3 Constable Richard McCain said, "it was 45, she was doing 60." Winkfein admits she was speeding in the dangerous strip of highway. "He explained to her," Constable McCain said, "sign the ticket stub; it's not an admission of guilt. It's a promise to appear in court. She didn't want to. She said take me to jail." That's when the officer says she exited her vehicle and was uncooperative. "She refused to get off the side of the road, he said to her, “Ma'am, you're under arrest.” She used profanity," the Constable said. He adds she got violent, and the officer used a taser on her leaving some taser scars.
Later.
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