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"It's too bad stupidity isn't painful." Volume 15, Number 21, May 23, 2010 Greetings, and thanks for joining me for another week. Starting us off are a few news stories you may have missed. First,from Reuters, this Bit made the mainstream news, but it is such a happy story I had to share it. Ninjas are not known for their gentleness, but a group of fighters came to the rescue of a student in Sydney who was being viciously beaten by muggers. Ninjas scared off three men who were attacking a 27-year-old German medical exchange student in an alleyway outside their warrior school. One of the teachers saw the attack and instructed the students, who were decked out in their black garb, to go out and confront the muggers. "You should have seen their faces when they saw us in ninja gear coming toward them," said the school's sensei (master teacher). Another ninja, Steve Ashley, said: "It was probably the worst place in Sydney where they could have taken him."Next, last month the First Amendment received a boost. The town of Olathe, Kan., became the second city in two years to settle lawsuits filed by citizens who were arrested for flashing their middle fingers at police officers, thus appearing to acknowledge that flipping the bird contemptuously at a cop is expressive conduct protected by the First Amendment. [KSHB-TV] Finally, here, it’s tattoos. There? Many mixed-race teenage boys in Cape Town, South Africa, secure their ethnic identity by having several upper front teeth removed. A University of Cape Town professor said fashion and peer pressure were primary motives for creating the tooth-gap. (The ceremony includes fitting dentures for the gap just in case, to give the boys flexibility.) [Daily Telegraph - London] Quite an accomplishment… I think. A Chinese martial arts expert pulled an airplane for five meters - by a rope hooked to his eyelids. Dong Changsheng, 50, performed the stunt at the Changchun International Exhibition Centre in Jilin province. It took him less than a minute to pull the half-a-ton aircraft for five meters. Dong has been practicing kung fu for nearly 40 years, and has collected numerous awards for his skills. "I have pulled a car with my eyelids before but this was the first time with an airplane," he said. "To be honest, I didn't use my full strength and I think I could probably pull it three times the distance.” I have built up the body strength to do this but it would be very dangerous for ordinary people so I don't want anyone to copy me." (Like anyone would want to) Police have unveiled their latest weapon in the fight against crime - a pedal-powered patrol car complete with siren and blue flashing light. Officers believe building their new five-gear vehicle, which has a top a speed of 20mph, will help them combat “anti-social behavior” (yeah, people will be too busy laughing). The battery-assisted car has full Hampshire Constabulary livery - and a roll bar to protect the driver in the event of a crash. PC Keith Waller spent 40 hours painstakingly building the car with children at Ringwood Comprehensive School. "Getting youngsters involved gives them something to focus on at lunch and after school so they are not out there committing anti-social behavior." I have been able to reach out to the students and make the police more approachable. It makes me look cooler, we all have fun and the children can come and talk to me." (http://web.orange.co.uk) By the way, I saw a picture. About looking cool… no way. Someone who needs to get a life…. Police in Stevens Point, Wisc., received several complaints of someone shooting blow darts out of a van at pedestrians as it drove by. After the fourth such report, they arrested Paula Wolf, 41, from Plover. After several denials, Wolf admitted the drive-by shootings because, investigators say, "she liked to hear people say 'ouch'." If convicted, Wolf faces up to 12-1/2 years in prison. [Wausau Daily Herald]. Idiot. Some people are chick magnets; others…. Willie McTyere, 29, of Niagara Falls, N.Y., says he was just minding his own business outside a bar when he was shot. "He said he was sitting in his car in the parking lot when he heard gunshots," said the city's chief of detectives, "and then a bullet hit his windshield and then struck him in the forehead." Sounds bad, but "it was just a flesh wound," the detective said. McTyere was released after being treated at a local hospital. The weird part? Almost the same thing happened to McTyere three months before, outside a different bar in the city. Police said the two shootings don't appear to be related. [Buffalo News] Sounds like something from “Criminal Minds” (edgy, but I love that show). Lisa Spence, 35, was missing, and police in Miramar, Fla., suspected her boyfriend, Paul Edwards, 44, knew what had happened to her. Spence's cell phone was also missing: police say Edwards sent several texts from it to convince her friends and relatives she moved away, but Spence's relatives said she didn't send text messages. With no evidence to match their suspicions, police transferred her cell account to a phone they had, and sent Edwards a text message from her number: "Just wait til I got better." Minutes later, police say, Edwards jumped into a car and drove off, unwittingly leading detectives to her decapitated body when he checked to make sure it was still where he had left it. He has been charged with murder. [South Florida Sun Sentinel] From BARCS (Baltimore Animal Rescue & Care Shelter): a story that confirms what I suspect about some people. A young female Pit Bull was found in Southwest Baltimore doused with gasoline and left to burn to death. A Baltimore City police Officer was quickly on the scene and risked her own life putting out the fire with her sweatshirt. The Pit Bull was brought to BARCS. Despite the severe pain she was in, she wagged her tail and looked for comfort from the BARCS staff members. Seeing her strength and will to live, the BARCS staff quickly decided to utilize the BARCS Franky Fund, created to help homeless animals in need of immediate medical care. She was then transferred to Swan Harbor Animal Hospital for initial lifesaving care. She has been nicknamed Phoenix, and while she is now safe and in good hands, she is certainly not out of the woods. She has suffered horrific burns over 95% of her body. The fire stripped the fur and flesh from her small figure. “No animal deserves this type of treatment,” said Jennifer Mead-Brause, BARCS Executive Director. “This is one of the most severe cases of animal cruelty I’ve ever seen.” Sorry, but anyone who mistreats children, the elderly, or animals doesn’t deserve the title of person. Finally, I probably should end on a positive note. The column is over for this week. Later.
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